klena: (a virgin losing a child)
First day back at work.

Same old, same old. Bored for the majority of the day. Realistically, I need to pull my finger out of my backside and start updating my CV and applying for jobs.

Supposed to go back to the gym for the first time in months today, however Dave talked me out of it. To be fair, I was keen on getting home to open my Illamasqua order (new eyeshadows! Eyeliners! Etc!)

This evening I have done very little. Felt a little off kilter.

Spoke to my today about the news I got working on New Years, that a former colleague of mine suddenly passed away on the 27th. She was a woman full of fire and life. It seems so strange. And then another friend told me on Saturday that a mutual friend of ours had also died - implied that it was suicide. She's just written a private blog post, and I've had a little weep in my bed, thinking about him. Couple this with attending a wake for a 20 year old lad on Christmas Eve, and I've been in a weird place.

Sad and strange.

So I am sitting in my bed, about to watch a few "feel good" videos to make it easier to fall asleep and then read for a little bit.
klena: (but when the sun shines again)
You know October, for being my favourite month, you sure have been a bit of a cow. It is nearly the end of the month and I feel a little lost as to where the time has gone.

I vanished because 2 weeks ago on Saturday, Dave's stepfather died. some medical information that might upset and the funeral )

So that was that. There was a wake afterwards at a nearby golfclub and I met a lot of Shirley's friends, Steve's family and various neighbours. Most of them knew me before I was introduced which was strange but everyone was lovely. We spent most of our time chatting with Dave's aunt, uncle, granddad, Jenny and Steve. We had a quiet dinner together that night, Dave, Shirley, Jenny, Steve and I.

The past few days have been filled with going out for walks with Walter, Shirley (and Steve's) black cocker spaniel, spending time with Shirley just talking and drinking lots of tea and seeing Dave's grandma. On top of that, we've been dealing with work as and when we've had some time at Shirley's. We've had aan issue with a Joker costume from our supplier and now the customer has cancelled the order. Customers demanding refunds for costumes they've returned STINKING of B.O. A US customer initating a chargeback for a Catwoman costume the day it arrives to her, stating it hasn't arrived. Ugh, I hate customers.

So pretty exhausting. We arrived back in Leeds last night and walked home. Climbed into bed and were asleep within 2 hours.

On top of all this, the Google Panda update a week ago seems to have completely fucked us up in website rankings. We were on the first page for most of our keywords and now we're 6 or 7 pages down. At the moment we're still doing okay because it's Halloween but after next week, it could seriously destroy the business. Dave's been pretty worried and really stressed unsurprisingly. The past two weeks have been a little tense - we've had two of the worst fights we've had since being together over the stupidest of things but considering the circumstances, it's not surprising. We're doing pretty good now with the funeral being done.

My plan now is to start searching for a job in case things do go tits up. We need at least one salary to survive on and two separate ones definitely isn't going to hurt. So updating my CV and applying for everything is on the list for this week. As Dave also pointed out, if I do get a job and I utterly hate it, there is still work for me to do with him. So that alleviates a lot of pressure.

Halloween's coming up and I'm completely unprepared. Unhappy face. However our local Co-Op is selling some huge pumpkins so I might treat myself to a pumpkin to carve and try baking or cooking with the innards. Anyone got any good pumpkin recipes?

I'm also trying to get my entries ready for the Joeyverse Cosplay Contest. The contumes are about 90% and 60% done respecitvely done. I just need to sort out time for Dave and I to shoot. Because he's my favourite and will only mock me a little for cosplay and tarting myself up.

Dave has now come in to bed so I am going to finish up and go to make myself a cup of hot chocolate before talking to mama Denvir and watching "Criminal Minds"
klena: (the motion makes me strong)
Every year I make resolutions and every year I seem to...forget about them at some point. So instead of wishing everyone I know a Happy New Year (and I do wish it for you, I do), I'm going to steal from my favourite, Mr. Neil Gaiman, for my New Year's wishes:


May your coming year be filled with magic and dreams and good madness. I hope you read some fine books and kiss someone who thinks you're wonderful, and don't forget to make some art -- write or draw or build or sing or live as only you can. And I hope, somewhere in the next year, you surprise yourself.


...I hope you will have a wonderful year, that you'll dream dangerously and outrageously, that you'll make something that didn't exist before you made it, that you will be loved and that you will be liked, and that you will have people to love and to like in return. And, most importantly (because I think there should be more kindness and more wisdom in the world right now), that you will, when you need to be, be wise, and that you will always be kind.



I wish all this for you. ♥
klena: (Default)
My life, the past week or so, and the reason for radio silence.

this happened )

In other news, why haven't my tweets been shipped over? Bizarre
klena: (to let the light in)
I haven't posted an actual journal entry since the robbery. Firstly, I'd like to thank everyone for their kind comments and actions and concern. You people helped me to get through it, and even though it's not over yet, I can't thank you enough for your kindness ♥

In a related update, we've heard nothing back from the police and searching Gumtree hasn't turned up any leads so I'm pretty resigned to everything being gone. Part of me is okay with it and another part is still heartbroken because I remember all the things I saved that are gone forever, like some of my photography that I never uploaded anywhere.

I've been doing photoshoots with Dave. I've got 4 photoshoots under my belt now, and the one of Sunday was pretty big - 6 models over a number of hours. I want to do more, to learn more photography techniques, to be better.

I also have a job interview tomorrow afternoon. I wanted a job at Waterstones, but I didn't get it, sadly. So I've been applying for jobs everywhere. And one hour after I applied for a job I got a phonecall to come for an interview tomorrow. Let's see how it goes.

I graduate next month. That doesn't get any easier to process. Neither do the goodbyes.
klena: (storm in the form of a girl)
So most of my LJ update page is being taken up with my Twitter-updates. I realise that must be really annoying for people to read. Sorry :/ However, I'm afraid I'm gonna have to ask you to stick with it for at least a little bit longer. (the page being made of Tweets, rather than genuine LJ posts) And why so?

Because....

I have now entered the Final Stages of my degree. Literally, it (should) be all engines go now, as I have less than 4 weeks before my degree is over. I finish on the 18th of May. That's less than a month from now.

In the interim of this month, I have to
- make sure all the research is done for my two essays
- finish reading "iHenryIV" for class tomorrow
- read "Austerlitz" (and nobody tell me about it!!)
- read "King Lear"
- do a mini-presentation on "King Lear"
- read "Samson Agonistes" for Milton
- plus more "Paradise Lost" for Milton seminar (and my essay)
- ...and "Paradise Regained" for class (and my essay)
- attend 4 more lectures on Shakespeare
- meet with my tutors to discuss my essays
- write a 4000 word essay on "Paradise Lost" - God and Satan
- write a 4000 word essay on a topic of my chosing for "Stories of the Eye" (most likely sexual desire and male anxiety of the female I think? Fuck fuck fuck!!)
- tweak said essays and make sure they are not complete bollocks
- hand in essays
- reread all my Shakespeare plays and highlight quotes to write and learn
- learn quotes
- attend 3hr15mns exam on Shakespeare

And then promptly die.

PLUS!!!

This list is only my academic list. Obviously it is the most important list of all lists ever yet there are still other important things to fit it as well such as:
- Housemate Hannah's birthday on Saturday
- My 1-year-(non)-anniversary with Dave on Sunday (OH MY FUCKING GOD *____*)
- The East Asian Ball (with my housemates and friends \o\ - fancy dresses and shit!!)

So, in other words, I am sorta kinda fucked. So fucked I have broken my life down into a timetable



See?

I'll give you a moment just to appreciate my organisation and bask in awe of my awesome procastination skills.

Ultimately I'm announcing a mini-haitus I guess? Understandably I hope. Not that you'll even notice I'm gone! I am not much of an internet presence anymore (woe and betide ;_;). But any spare thoughts of good, positive karma, psychic energy, internet hugs and reassurance would be so fucking massively loved upon, if you could spare it?

I've worked 3 years to get here. I want to leave my degree with (hopefully) a 2:1. I want to make my family proud. I want to do myself proud.

So! I'll still be checking LJ (because I can't keep myself away, no matter what the deadline, as January proved orz) but if I'm on MSN or AIM or Twitter, be nice to me? I feel like I should be having a breakdown now so I'm sort of resigned and waiting. I am a paragon of positive thoughts.

♥ ♥ ♥ you all fucktons. Metric fucktons even. Wish me well! Think of me, message me, text me, email me. You just might save my sanity. I'll be thinking (sporadically!) of you.
klena: (she cried out 'so the story fits')
It's started.

Frustrated as fuck being home. My tongue is heavy with insults, my shoulders are tense with strain, my skin is itching with frustration.

This is not my home anymore. I knew this within a week of being home over the summer. I was only home for 11 days at Christmas but I felt it then too. That period was easier to cope with because there was Christmas and my birthday and people to see and gifts to be bought.

Being home now is like being forced back into a cage or into an outfit, shoes that you disgarded years ago because it wasn't you anymore, it didn't fit right, the shoes made your feet bleed.

I have no job here anymore, therefore the McDonalds crew barely remember my existence. My Jules is halfway around the world and she allowed me to breathe a bit easier because we both come back for the same reasons. I have few people here I have any desire to go out and see. I was never really attached to home when I was here, I had no circle or chains.

Dave is busy and we've not been much in contact but what could I say? I feel like crying down the phone with my frustration. This place isn't my life anymore. I love my family, I have to remember that, but they drive me mad. And they are my only contact here. (I do count Libby and June and Jenni as points of contact). Dave admitted he wouldn't spend 2 weeks at home. And maybe this is the last time I'll do this.

Next week will surely be better. There is the CAPAA scheme on for 3 days of the week, which will lead to more social contact and keeping my head busy. Then I have dad's birthday on the 12th and then Leeds on the 14th. But that's 14 days away from now. 14 days feels like it will drive me out of my skin screaming. It could be that I'm oversensitive and prickly because of the time of month.

Maybe I'll ask Dave to ring me tonight, a touchstone. But he shouldn't have to deal with my crazy. I've only been away 4 days.

Fuck.

This mood also brought to you by the news that if I want my lovely Creative Zen to work again, I have to fork out £231 because it's out of warranty but it wasn't when it broke. fucking idiot.
klena: (listening to our apocalypse suite)
So, it's the beginning of December. I've been in Leeds for 93 days which seems like a stupidly short time when it's reduced to days. The State of the Union post is delayed once again because about 3 weeks ago my laptop shut itself off. It wasn't the first time it had done this but instead of coming back on when I tried about an hour later it has refused to show any signs of life.

I'm currently using my housemate's old laptop (love hannah ;_;) but it doesn't recognise my external harddrive when it's plugged in nor does it have the majority of my bookmarks saved to it. In other words, I'm making excuses for not being around.

Another reason for not being around yet again is due to final year. I'm not so much being raped by my degree as constantly being told "AGAINST THE WALL NOW" at multiple points over the last 10 or so weeks.

I'm doing okay though. I've just been going back over my few lj entries from the last year or so and realising just how things have changed for me.

. I'm with someone - granted, not officially but we are a couple regardless of titles. Sometimes we are practically in each others brains but we're doing okay for 7 months. It's the longest one man has been in my life. It's not easy - we both have talked about how it's not easy for us; he owns his own business and this is my final year of university but we do our best to make it work. And, in his own words about a month ago, he "wouldn't change a second of the last 6 months". He's been so good for me. Yes, it sucks having to fight to spend time with him but even if I head to his when he's working, I have nothing to do but work so I've been working far harder than I have done every other year I've been here at university.
. I'm off medications. Did I ever tell anyone that? I came off my medication sometime before Easter, as far as I can remember, because I wanted to try depression on my own terms and learn how to cope with myself when I am sad. And I've had a few patches. I was a ball of horrible venomous rage over the summer because I was working myself to death and I had a 'bad week' about two weeks ago where I had no desire to work, to eat, to get out of bed and I was just sad all the time. It's still lingering but I'm working hard to not let it cripple me.
. I'm actually working on my degree. Besides doing my core work, I'm reading beyond my module. I'm trying to make my brain better
. I don't have a job anymore. I quit Fab in April and got with Dave my last day. It's funny to say that because I was working last night to cover for everyone else but it's made life a little tougher regarding budgeting and in another way it's made things easier because I'm not stressing about working and losing my weekend because of late shifts.
. I'm not being creative. This is a minus for me but I haven't been overly creative in probably months. Tons of ideas for art bouncing around my head and the desire to flesh out characters and be more involved in online RPs but that's hard to do when you fight to spend time with someone and be a good housemate and not fail your degree.
. The end of that last point pretty much sums up my life actually. Being a housemate, being a partner, being a student.

Things aren't so bad. I'm still very hard on myself. I hate myself sometimes and god, I get so lonely other times and I feel like nobody cares about me. I need affection and to be reminded that people care about me except I can never ask for such things. And it's stupid and immature and a failing of mine. But maybe one day I'll be beyond it.

I was toying with the idea of New Years Letters. Would anyone be interested?
klena: (so weird how time goes on)
Obligatory LJ post to ell people that I'm not dead although I'm not exactly functioning on the higher levels due to post-exam slump. Seriously, pin me at fire bad, tree pretty level about now.

The exams are over, the module that caused an awful lot of the "someone kick me in the head now" and various freak out lj posts is over, I got my marks back and the essays came in at a 51 and 57 and the translation in at a 55 so I'm...not pleased, I guess. That'd mean I'd have to have had some stock in the module but I feel more at ease knowing that I haven't failed a university module.

Had a crappy couple of weeks spent fundamentally on my own, upset after exams and having to move and people not being around and not getting to spend time with Dave. That last one was pretty sucky and still is but we talked about it, so. It still sucks but I got out why it sucks and we're (re: I) am trying to be a little calmer and take all this as it comes. Because in about a week's time I'm going home to see my pregnant Libby-Lou (who should no longer be pregnant by that point, fuck fuck fuck!) and go back to McDonalds and get into the CAPAA summer scheme again and spend my summer running about like a crazy lady. But I also won't see most of the Leeds crew and Dave until September so. Plus points, minus points, take your corners.

What else do I have to say? Nothing of extreme importance although due to my own epic packing procastination there should theoretically be ARPG and ZQL posts spilling from me very soon. Because nothing says procastination better than spilling yourself into another world(s).

Final Animesoc meet-up of the year tonight, which I really should be leaving for now as I'm missing two hours of it to go cover a flyering shift. But it'll be good times, I think! Hopefully. If not, I will come home early and make lasagne in order to use up as much of the meat in my freezer before next Friday.

Boring!post is boring! I am sorry!

Although in other news, my [livejournal.com profile] bandombigbang art piece was posted on in the last two days and my recipient seems really happy with it and people have been saying nice things! ;___; it's enough to make a girl cry! (Other things that make me cry are the fact that half my inking pens all decided to give up the ghost in the middle in inking. Curse you Murphy!)

So, hi guys! How is everything going with you? How's the summer?
klena: (heed to your heart)
Six weeks since updating and no doubt this entry I start with good intentions will descend into a series of convoluted explanations and a dull chain of events (nowhere near as theraputic, except depending on where you stand)

I had to take off my watch to start typing this - what does that say about me?

Theoretically, the best way to do this would be to choose - find a point, fix myself to it (stick my courage to the sticking place but I cannot wash things away, just like she cannot remove the spots from her hands) and progress. Move forward and breathe. That's not the way this story goes; it's not who I am, I am a jumble of inadaquaces that I manage to conceal until I am actually needed in a tangible way.

I'm about to spill my innards before you all now; not just the pretty image of the heart glistening and vibrant with life, but the visceral content of my body and all the sick little truths that comprise this sad frame I call myself.

I am ill, currently. I have spent the last 3 days vomiting my guts up, having horrible nausea, migraines, fevers, cold sweats and miserable moods. There is nothing I hate more than nausea. I prefer to spill my guts out constantly for a day rather than to be nauseous for a week.

I had no heating for 5 days. I don't believe this helped this flu that I have been sensing for about a week now. So bad that I could see my breath before me a few nights, and that's not a metaphor.

I work. I work at Fab Cafe, a movie memorabilia bar, that I adore but i missed a shift to flyer tonight. Three strikes in less than 6 months, you're out? I imagine so.

There are debt collectors after me still. I don't know how to deal with them and I would rather sell a kidney than have to deal with debt problems ever again.

I have 9 piercings now. 3 in each ear, my nose, my lip (off to the side) and my tongue. My tongue hurt like a bitch and i hope i never have to take it out because i probably would not get it done again.

My dad had a health scare recently. Within the last 2 months, he started having chest pains that were causing his left side to go numb-ish. He went through a series of blood tests, ECGs and, finally, stayed in the hospital for 5 days worth of monitoring roughly 2 weeks ago. All I wanted was to be home even though I would have just been a wreck. They still haven't figured out what's wrong but it's not his heart - or not obviously his heart. He's massively cut down on his smoking and drinking and now goes for walks in the evening. I've been so scared for him - I haven't been able to shake the feeling under my skin that I was going to have to bury my father before I hit 25.

I began to cut myself off from a circle of people I started to care about because I felt I was losing them. Better to be the one to cut cord than to be the one hanging on. I am revising this plan of action but I don't actually think my initial knee-jerk fear was so wrong.

I haven't smoked since before Christmas, I haven't self-harmed in 4 months and I've changed my medication again. I keep starting over again - maybe one of these times I'll get it right.

Of my close circle of girls (there are a circle of 4 and numberous other singulars), one is engaged and another is expected a child. I am so scared, the world gets older everytime I close my eyes.

Bandom is still my closest addiction and fandom right now. Recently, I have been not worthy of note in any endeavour I set myself in, particularly my co-mod status in [livejournal.com profile] super_bandom but I've been working on my return.

In the past 2 weeks, I have spent nights in the library until midnight, studying and reading and enjoying being a student. I have forsaken all others, shaking off ties of friendship (arguably, and I am a contrary enough bitch to argue the point) in order to work on my degree. This has also lead to my return to writing and art and creation. It feels like some of my cells are being reborn. that is such a ridiculously pretentious English-student way of putting it, but it is the truth. I have missed it, like I miss my home or the feel of my mum's arms or a small scrap of paper/single 0001011010101010001 that comprise a message that read "i miss you, i think of you, where are you?"

My faith is a contentious issue at the best of times but this year I am taking part in Lent. I am giving up swearing and asking for sponsorship. Everyday I fail, I make up the money I should have made that day. At the end of Lent, I plan to donate my scrapings to the charity my mum has founded. There are, however, exceptions to my rule. Swearing in songs (mild, borderline inoffensive as I am going to see the Cobras and Fall Out Boy before the end) and during seminars where our poets swear (Swift, I am looking at you) and for fiction/RP purposes. Myself, as a person, an entity, shall not swear. So the theory goes.

I am single and lonely but "the best of us can find happiness in misery". I tasted the misfortune of trying something, knowing it was unlikely to work and i broke myself, twisted my heart into knots trying to not be such a "fuck-up" and allow this genuinely amazing guy into my life. He is still in my life, but as a friend. It's better this way. It doesn't stop the pain I felt during the period or the pain I feel I have caused him, but I believe that this is for the best.

My skin itches for a tattoo. "I Have Been All Things Unholy" "The fall shall further the flight in me", "I went under the sea. I have been dead, and yet am not alive, but let me rest still", "your halo better gleam", "never knew a part of you you didn't set in ink" and/or "heed to your heart, and not to your wit". I feel it under my skin.

I am a self-depreciating, pitying little fuck and I hate myself for it sometimes.

I am going home for Easter. I will be home for my dad's birthday, and will belatedly celebrate my brother's 21st.

I am moving house at the end of this year.

Recently my geekery has diversified. I have been reading comic books beyond Sandman. "The Umbrella Academy", "Runaways", "Fables", "Lucifer", "The Boys", "Y: The Last Man" and "Watchmen" are all recent geek readings. It has been amazing and I want to try to write a dissertation/thesis next year on graphic novels//comics as representations of modern literature. "Watchmen" will really fucking help me out there. Movie - 2 weeks!

Sunday nights, with the exception of the past Sunday, have been reserved for me and [livejournal.com profile] rogue_dreams to watch Supernatural.

[livejournal.com profile] rogue_dreams has probably saved my life in subtle ways since the start of this year. She is my soul twin, my non-girlfriend, my Supernatural-watching partner. We don't need to spend an inordinate amount of time in each other's presence but I love it when we do. She's snarky and a bit of a bitch but in an awesome, take-no-bollocks kind of way that I desperately have needed and funny and fangirlish and what I would be like if I were more talented and more driven. I am, and I rarely use words like these, blessed to have her in my life.

I miss those of you I know online but I cut myself off from lj for periods of time because I believe I deserve you lot. Hence why I vanish. I am usually guilting myself somewhere or working or studying.

I cannot sleep tonight. I'm sweating from this fever but I'm cold and can't get comfortable and can't sleep more than 3 hours. I feel jumbled and slightly lost and it's not just illness that is causing this but I'll blame it on that tomorrow.

"Think of us at all, if not as lost" - where is that from? Have I studied that? It's in my head and daylight is filtering in and I am going to have a shower because it is 7am and I want to try and sleep this migraine-headpain off.  
klena: (dry my eyes and keep on walking)
Thousands of things to say and a huge introspective journal entry coming but had to commit this to (it's not memory really, nor is it ink) little 0s and 1s before i forgot it in my haste to say other things that might not make much sense.

Before going back to my notes (and leaping from witchcraft to 17th Century political theorists to revenge tragedies) I want to get you involved with me for a little bit. Because I've been an absentee from this year and I feel like I'm drifting away on a tide (caught in riptide) and I want to know you. I love you already, but I want to know you better and I want you to know me better.

Anyway, behind all my Wentzian drabble, what I'm saying is this.

I am writing New Year (New Self) letters to anyone who wants them. You can just ask for one and I'll ramble about anything. You can ask me here questions you want me to answer about myself (things you feel you should know, who the fuck am I and why am I on your friendslist etc etc) and I'll write a response to you, and i'll ask about you and what i wish for you this coming year.

It might even be a fairytale.

Comments will be locked so no worry about people viewing things. Just....please get involved. Even if you've never left me a comment, even if you couldn't care less about this idea, it's always nice getting mail, right?
klena: (Default)
I am moving out of my room in 3 hours.

I have not slept properly in a while.

I have so much stuff.

I have so much to say.

Ask me about this year if you wish - I'll be so open with you.

I don't really want to go back home - is that awful?

I need some support I'm afraid
klena: (Default)
NEW YEARS EVE - FUCKING NEW YEARS EVE

[livejournal.com profile] darthzal I only got your comment. I'm so so sorry!

I am knackered my darlings.

But I'm here, I'm alive, I'm back.

...

Any questions?

Look look! A pic of a Kat - a Neko - at university!

Sumimasen!! )
klena: (transcendence)
I know I've been woeful at the LJ business. I really, really do realise this. And I'm so sorry for not getting back to people and commenting on things and just being there. But being back here has equalled work and the EMO and bollockery that comes with work.

Plus there was that day off spent mostly in casualty because of my heart. Hurrah~!

Anyways! I've been invited out tonight so I won't be around to post at midnight and wish you all a happy new year, so I've decided to do it now!

Happy New Years, my darlings~!

I know I'm sorta lacking as a friend but I do think of you. I really do. And I worry about you and I cheer for you and I'm always here for you. You know that, right?

~~~~~~~~~

First Lines of the posts of 2006 )

~~~~~~~

I'm going to do a mini-icon overhaul in the next few days and I want to know what you think of the icons I use.

Is there one that you associate with me?
Is there one that you think I should keep up?
One that you don't understand my keywords for?
A fandom you think I should represent more?
An icon I need to get rid of?

~~~~~~~

Coming up in the next post! (Hopefully tomorrow!)

- Final Waltz smut~!

- Any questions you want answered about my year

- 2006 in recap for me

- Art review of the year

- Music meme (i.e. pimping musics out to you~!)

- Probably some commentary on my night, ha ha ha~!

~~~~~~~~~~

OK folks, that's all from me for now!

I'll see you all in 2007!
klena: (Default)
WHEEEEEEEEEEEE! HAPPY MOTHERFUCKING 2006 FOLKS!!!! XDDDDD

I wanted to post on the first but my life - she is a cruel mistress. XDDD I was in work today. WOE

AND THEN AND THEN AND THEN AND THEN



I TOTALLY FORGOT I HAD A FUCKING CHALLENGE ENTRY DUE TODAY! DDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD: By fluke, I caught my LJ name as I was glancing over my F-list and it mentioned the Illustrated Fic contest I had put my name down for. I've had the story I was meant to illustrate saved since I got it - even read it a few times - but I completely forgot what date it was due.*

DDDDDDDDDDDDDDD: me DDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD:XXX

So unimpressed with self.

Which meant that tonight was spent pulling together the entry and sending [livejournal.com profile] hybrid_xisha texts about needing inspiration for Blackcest. However it is a rather impressive 6 pages and almost SMUTTY in parts! :DDDDD Therefore, it will be shown.

Actually I might need an art beta tomorrow once I get home from work to tell me where my proportions have gone wrong and how cross-eyed the characters look. So, anyone I catch on MSN tomorrow once I get home from work EXPECT ME TO SPAM YOU WITH QUESTIONS AND ART**

So lose at life.

And I work 9 - 5 tomorrow. Really should go to bed then. Woe. Hahahaha, I put my uniform on the radiator last night and my room smelt like McDonalds. Hahahahaha.

AWAY! TO BED WITH ME!***

* THEREFORE I will be needing someone to poke me and ask how my Valensmut entry is getting along. DDD:

* Those uncomfortable with incesty themes and boys kissing boys are, of course, exempt.

** Actually, it's more likely I'll be pulling together my '2005 in recap' and glaring at the Blackcest. Then sleeping. XP

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